Stories

When you became my muse, an intimate relationship was bound from my words to your actions. Binding us closer to each other.  Cathartic relief is released from the sinews of my muscles and small air pockets between the tendons in my spine.

But,

You do not know.

You know none of this.

No.

However, I do.

I

Know.

And it is enough.

So we are bound.  Like in a tale told in ancient carpets-

they are stories, you know? Stories.  Like how they met and who was courting whom.  The people, setting, season, and costumes of the golden years: a forgotten time remembered in pictures, silk and wool.
Who is the proprietor of the stories: the child sewing each strand or the keeper of the carpets?

fireworks

Don't act like that-

Or do I feel deeper than you?

I know you sense this, this surge and this connection, yet somehow I know-

our love tremors in a lower baseline within me

        than within

you. 

How do I know this? This truth?

A stark clear white. Eggshell.

I know from your lackadaisical ease: the strut in your walk and the glance in your stare

(gaze along the sand at the other beach babes) 

Don't be so lazy, lazy with your love.

Sunshine-ing your days away suckin' on orange Popsicles …

We could have been great: you and I

crowned Queen and King of the Funshine Fair holding our own

aquarium castle-

taking it home in a brown crinkly paper bag.

twilight and busy sidewalks

pink brush strokes on navy skyline

Where will it go; where shall we place it?

Our carpet feels warm on my feet,

humid

Oh, easy, next to the spider plant on our

Windowsill: cool breeze in my hair as I place it on the stained paint.

Makes everyone laugh at our next party.

Decorate it with tinsel for our first Christmas together.

It never was this way-

I was not nearly as brave as to take you on.

And you- you knew me too well.

Too well to see our future: the realization that I wasted all my youth on you.

And now I have nothing to show for it.

Nothing,

but some used teal tinsel and a

plastic castle.

For my darling Daddy

There are no words to describe the magnitude of love between my father and I.  Our friendship, our bond, and all that he has taught me and given me.  There are no words. 

My Dad was a non-conformist who valued love, family, friends, and everyone's happiness above all else.  

My Dad was a man with a heart of gold who had the courage to walk among us with his great big open heart on his sleeve. Allowing such vulnerability in order to spread love, happiness, and peace.  

My Dad was a great man who has left us a beautiful legacy.  

I am the luckiest girl to have had you as my father. 

Thank you for everything. 

I will see you on the other side Dad.

I love you.